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18 years ago I sat
where you are sitting.
I soaked in every
word that Ray taught.
I poured myself into
lab assignments.
And it changed my
life.
Seriously, I
couldn't figure out why no one had ever taught me this stuff before.
The Scriptures were
opened up in a whole new way for me and the Bible came to life.
17 years ago I stood
where I'm standing now, as a [Bible Study Methods] lab instructor.
It was the single
most fulfilling thing I had ever done.
I kept coming back,
teaching a total of 5 semesters.
12 years ago my
husband Danny and I sold most of our things, packed up the rest, and headed to
the Philippines as missionaries. We were more than ready. We had 4 years of the
best Bible training on the planet tucked under our belts, teaching and church ministry
experience, a strong team of prayer and financial supporters, a set of gifts
that were a perfect match for the needs our mission advertised, and a
commitment to reach Filipino Muslims with the gospel.
Weeks stretched into
months as our initial enthusiasm wore off. We floundered. Ministry
opportunities were not unfolding the way we had anticipated. Life in Manila was
really tough. It was hot. We wilted. It was smoggy. We could hardly breathe.
Language school was brutal. We were so homesick.
One day I was
walking to the market to see my Muslim friends. I thought about their lives.
They were immigrants from another island, far from home and trying to get along
in a new language. Squatters by day and squatters by night, they sold pirated
goods along the street without a permit and lived in makeshift homes on
property they did not own. At any moment the police could show up and drag them
off to jail for any number of infractions. The women sat pregnant in the hot
sun for hour after hour selling combs and batteries and cell phone covers.
After their babies were born they left them home with an older sibling and
return to the market to sell again so the family could eat.
On my way to the
market that day I felt so, so empty. What did I have that these friends really
needed? I had come prepared to teach Bible study methods, but they could hardly
read or write. We were here to reach them with the gospel, but what tangible benefit
did the gospel offer them? A stable income? Reliable housing? What I knew to
offer was a far cry from what they needed. As for godly character, I was
depressed and discouraged, cranky and selfish, homesick and tired. I had come
armed with colored pencils and an inductive Bible study method. I felt a little
silly.
It was around this
time that I got an email from Dr. Karl Kutz [another of my professors from Multnomah]. He was conducting a survey of
graduates from the biblical languages program to find out our greatest
accomplishments post-graduation. My Greek and Hebrew Bibles had made the trek
across the ocean with me, but frankly, they sat untouched on my shelves getting
moldy from the humidity. My greatest accomplishment? Umm… at first I groaned.
There was nothing much that belonged on a resume. After some thought I decided
that my most noteworthy accomplishment was that I could walk unannounced into a
Muslim neighborhood climb the cement stairs of a 3-story building onto the
rooftop where two families lived -- my friends from the market. Salma and Aisah
and their husbands were raising their small children on that rooftop with no
railings. Two lean-to shelters stood side by side, with corrugated metal roofs
and walls with scrap linoleum floors. Their only furniture was a table on which
the TV and a small gas stove were kept, powered with illegal gas and
electricity. We sat on the floor as the pouring rain seeped through the holes
in the floor and soaked our clothes. We talked and laughed, and I prayed in
Filipino for Aisah's new baby, whom she had named Ishmael, or for Salma's whom
she had named Eliana, after my own daughter. I longed for these friends to meet
the Savior. I loved them, and I knew they loved me.
They had no pencil
between them, and they could not read their copy of the Qur'an which was
carefully wrapped and tucked between the wooden post and metal walls of their
home. I would never have an opportunity to teach them inductive Bible study
methods. That's not what they needed anyway. We all cried when Danny and I were
called to move back to the US.
Yes, I've
accumulated more degrees since then, and my Greek and Hebrew are not as rusty
as they were in 2003. But if Dr. Kutz sent me that email again today I'm not
sure that my answer should be any different. Allow me some liberties with 1 Cor
13:1–2:
If I read fluently in the languages of the ancient near east, but do not have love,
I have become
a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I have impressive intellectual powers, advanced degrees,
and an exegetical method than can unlock
all mysteries and all knowledge,
and if
I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.
Soak in all you can
this semester. It is valuable training, and it will shape you in profound ways.
But know this: without love, we are nothing.
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